{"id":636,"date":"2009-09-22T13:50:53","date_gmt":"2009-09-22T13:50:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/paulgoodchild.net\/blog\/?p=636"},"modified":"2011-11-23T00:11:34","modified_gmt":"2011-11-23T00:11:34","slug":"relationship-game-between-men-women-part-1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/paulgoodchild.me\/blog\/relationship-game-between-men-women-part-1\/","title":{"rendered":"The relationship game between men and women, Part 1"},"content":{"rendered":"

Are you in a relationship?\u00a0 Is it wrecking your head?<\/p>\n

I recently attended a seminar in Koh Samui<\/a>, Thailand, about relationships and how to “find” that wonderful partner and get the best out of our current relationships.<\/p>\n

It was a little different, discussing male and female “energies”, light and dark characteristics and how they can complement or clash with one another.<\/p>\n

It also outlined the 3 levels <\/em>of relationship that exist today as a powerful illustration into our own relationships.<\/p>\n

It was great to hear some things I’ve already learned reflected back at me, but there was a lot of new material to consider with its application to my own life.<\/p>\n

In this article I will share with you some of the salient points with a little of my own assessment.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Energy: Light and Dark, Male and Female<\/h2>\n

The session began by taking several human characteristics and categorising them as either “male energy” or “female energy”, drawing on those present to decide.\u00a0 It was usually self-evident how the characteristics fell and each of them was then further labelled as “light” and “dark” (positive and negative, respectively).<\/p>\n

Take for example, the characteristic ‘strong<\/strong>, <\/em>protective<\/strong>‘ – this is a positive male energy, while it’s female complement could be termed ‘soft<\/strong>, <\/em>gentle<\/strong>, <\/em>nurturing<\/strong>‘.\u00a0 The dark side of this energy for male and female is represented by ‘violent, angry<\/em>‘ and ‘weak, whining, nagging<\/em>‘, respectively.<\/p>\n

To make this a little clearer, another example is:<\/p>\n

\n

LIGHT:<\/em><\/p>\n

Male – Empowering<\/p>\n

Female – Inspiring<\/p>\n

DARK:<\/em><\/p>\n

Male – Coercive, Dominating<\/p>\n

Female – Manipulative<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Have a go yourself, what is the light\/dark, female\/male equivalent of the light female characteristic of ‘wisdom<\/strong>, <\/em>intuition<\/strong>‘…?\u00a0 Or, how about the light <\/em>male characteristic of ‘providing<\/strong>‘…?<\/p>\n

Some other positive male energies are: humour, trustworthiness, loyalty.<\/em><\/p>\n

Some other positive female energies are: loving, trusting, considerate, sensitive<\/em><\/p>\n

After several examples and discussion, the question was posed: which value\/characteristic is considered most fundamentally important in a relationship for males, and which is most important for females?<\/p>\n

The conclusion was that freedom<\/strong> is most significant for men, and for females safety<\/strong> was top priority.\u00a0 No-one seemed to dispute this on either side.<\/p>\n

Full appreciation of this fact by both men and women is critical for any relationship, and this formed the basis for the rest of the discussion.<\/p>\n

The 3 levels of relationships<\/h2>\n

The following definitions of the 3 levels of relationships clearly outline the imbalances of male and female energies, both light and dark, in contemporary relationships.\u00a0 The first 2 represent the most prevalent types that exist today, and illustrates quite plainly why so many of us have deep rooted problems with their partners.<\/p>\n

Level 1: Dependence<\/h3>\n

In this relationship the man will be the “bread winner” and hold most of the strength in the relationship.\u00a0 He works a lot and earns the money, but doesn’t show the love needed to his partner.\u00a0 She on the other hand resents the fact that he is out working most of the time and doesn’t show her the attention she feels she deserves.\u00a0 She demands of him tasks and chores to be done and nags at him when he doesn’t either do them properly or not within the time frames that she has demanded.\u00a0 He defends himself that he’s busy, he’s working, or otherwise.\u00a0 They dig themselves deeper into this pattern of demanding, nagging, lack of cooperation, until resentment runs quite deep. She has no way to control his behaviour and turn him around to what she wants so she typically stops “putting out”.\u00a0 This may in turn lead him to look outside the relationship for sexual fulfillment and ultimately, hearts are broken.<\/p>\n

Level 2: Independence<\/h3>\n

Desiring not to repeat the sins of their parents, the next generation responds by going the other way.\u00a0 The woman will try to prove that she doesn’t need a man to provide for her and can look after herself, indefinitely.\u00a0 She can work just as hard as any man can and may power through the business world earning her keep and supporting herself and her man.\u00a0 She is running on negative male energy and is likely to be aggressive and domineering.\u00a0 The complementary man in this case is seeking to chill-out, relax, and not stress, but basically will not provide for her or the family.\u00a0 He will be running a lot of negative female energy and will rely on her for sustenance and financial support and generally be quite dull and unintelligent, with little or no motivation other than to enjoy himself.\u00a0 He’s weak, boring, selfish and likely a little chaotic.\u00a0 While they are both “together”, they are living quite independently with little or no cooperation.<\/p>\n

Level 3: “Gender Synergy”<\/h3>\n

This is the place to be.\u00a0 Both male and female are running predominantly their respective positive energies that complement one another.\u00a0 The man is providing for her and the family with the help of inspiration and support from his partner.\u00a0 She is supportive, nurturing and loving, while he is strong, focus and empowered.\u00a0 Everything they do is with the intention for the betterment of themselves and each other.\u00a0 She trusts him 100{97de8d2e860196f43620abbbd870152438d0e1a3bef5042cd7be1942d94df9d0}, and he naturally raises himself to meet this expectation.\u00a0 His desire is to be free, and she allows him that.\u00a0 Her desire is to be safe and secure, and he strives to provide that with everything that he does.<\/p>\n

Naturally, everyone makes mistakes and doesn’t always perform at peak or correctly, but intentions are pure. She is connecting with her inner-Goddess, while he is honouring it, looking only to serve, since doing so, in his own way and his own time <\/em>is what empowers him most.<\/p>\n

With an hour and a half discussion of this, there was a lot of material covered, with examples and illustrations that can’t quite make it onto a single post.\u00a0 I hope the salient points of what was posed and relayed are clear enough.<\/p>\n

My thoughts on all this…<\/h2>\n

I haven’t given my interpretations (except of the seminar details itself) of all of this yet, but this post is already long enough.\u00a0 This has given me an incredible amount of food for thought.\u00a0 Not all of it is new to be honest, but it’s certainly made me think.<\/p>\n

I’m going to post some my musings that came from this both to explain the principles better and also just to journal it.<\/p>\n

[Update] A follow-up post, Part 2<\/a>, is now available.<\/p>\n

If you have any comments or questions, or points you feel need to be raised, please feel free to do so below.\u00a0 You can also share this page using the links immediately below this article.\u00a0 I hope you found it fun, informative, or thought-provoking.\u00a0 Or all of the above.\u00a0 Thank you for visiting.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Are you in a relationship?\u00a0 Is it wrecking your head? I recently attended a seminar in Koh Samui, Thailand, about relationships and how to “find” that wonderful partner and get the best out of our current relationships. It was a little different, discussing male and female “energies”, light and dark characteristics and how they can […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[75],"tags":[119,109,107,106,108,7,32,111,105,110],"class_list":["post-636","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-cat-grow-your-mind","tag-balance","tag-female-energy","tag-freedom","tag-goddess","tag-male-energy","tag-personal-development","tag-personal-growth","tag-relationship-games","tag-relationships","tag-synergy"],"yoast_head":"\nThe relationship game between men and women, Part 1 - Plog - Paulie's Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/paulgoodchild.me\/blog\/relationship-game-between-men-women-part-1\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The relationship game between men and women, Part 1 - Plog - Paulie's Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Are you in a relationship?\u00a0 Is it wrecking your head? 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